Surrogate Mother Search. What to do?
The key issue of the successful surrogacy journey, in some way, is the right choice of a surrogate mother (Gestational Carrier). Generally, health condition of your future child much depends on surrogate mother’s health, lifestyle, habits etc.
Many intended parents face the problem: “How to find a surrogate mother?”. To tell the truth, it’s not an easy task to find really good and responsible gestational carrier. It’s a pity but many surrogate candidates, as a matter of fact, are just cheats who are interested only in getting money. Wishing to save money and, in such a way, working without specialized surrogacy agencies, more and more intended parents instead of becoming parents just get into trouble.
There are so many ads like “Ready to become a surrogate for you”, some even with huge and detailed life stories. But, in most cases, these pathetic stories about the difficult life are created by cunny surrogates who “skillfully” move the sympathetic intended parents to pity for some money. Others don’t mind to live at the expense of the trusting intended parents. Such surrogates aren’t really interested in a successful pregnancy and childbirth. They just enjoy careless life provided by the intended parents who desire to have children.
There are also cases when women (who are informed about their health problems) suggest their surrogacy services only with one aim: to be examined at the best clinics and treated for free.
Not long ago, at one Russian website there was an interesting article about “prudent” surrogates. Being strongly concerned with the pregnancy at the first IVF cycle, surrogates prefer their husbands’/lovers’ services to the embryologist’s. So, it’s quite clear why DNA test is so important.
Many surrogates without any pangs of conscience demand more and more money threatening to make abortion or not to yield the child. Of course, intended parents who’ve dreamed about own baby agree to everything. Not optimistic prospects, aren’t they?
On the other hand, you can search among your relatives, friends or acquaintances. Cases when relatives (sisters, cousins and even mothers) carry a child to term occur too often. Pluses are evident: it’s usually free of charge and you can trust and rely on your surrogate mother. But is it really so? Preferring your sister not a strange person to carry your child, you might face serious psychological conflicts later. Practice confirms that it’s too difficult for a surrogate and intended parents to keep in touch as earlier after the childbirth.
So, how to find a surrogate mother?
Searching on your own and then get into material trouble, ruin relations with close people or turn to a special surrogacy agency and avoid painful disappointments described above? Think everything over not to lose your chance to become parents.